Thursday 30 June 2011

You’re Shitting Me Shatner

There’s a lot of conjecture over how actor William Shatner got started. Here’s a version of events, an early meeting between Shatner and his agent:
‘Hi Will, sit yourself down. Great news. Whaddya know? Gotcha a lead role. This guy in space. He’s a captain right? Takes his crew off to this planet, that planet. Shit kicks off. You know these aliens got it in fer ya.’
‘Wow! Hey, I can’t tell ya… This, this captain…’ (CLICK ON 'Read more' LINK, BELOW)

‘Kirk. His name’s Captain Kirk.’
‘This Captain Kirk. Any love interests?’
‘You kidding. One episode you boink this alien broad with three foreheads. Another one, she got eyes where her nose should be.’
‘Ah, I was thinking more of some romance with members of the crew? You know, call it a fetish, call it what you will, but I kinda got a thing for ladies with less foreheads, eyes above the nose.’
‘Hey, trust me everything else is in the right place with these alien girls. And some. Disfigured but cute. Know what I’m saying? What about your stage name? Didya bring me a list?’
Shatner passes his agent a sheet of paper.
‘William Shatner – that’s your real name. You kiddin’ me? What’s this? – John Shithead, Bob Crapper, James Shitmerself... I thought we agreed we were gonna try for something that didn’t make people think of shit?’
‘Well, I figured we’d be safe – no-one else woulda chosen them.’
Is that why ya come up with this name?’
‘One with the double-barrelled surname – sounds like a union of a Chinese and a Scottish parent.’
‘Remind me.’
‘Willie Wang-Kerr.’

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